


someway, baby, it's a part of me (apart from me)

by commonemergency



Series: ficmas 2017. [23]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-19 10:28:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13121844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/commonemergency/pseuds/commonemergency
Summary: They had accomplished a lot since then, learned to tackle the world in a different way; a quiet way.





	someway, baby, it's a part of me (apart from me)

**Author's Note:**

> this fic goes with my last two fics to be honest. can be read separately, but all around dan in the isle of man. 
> 
> i wrote this feeling the holiday blues, i didn't know where it was going but i still like it anyway.

Sometimes being under the covers can solve everything, _if just for a little while_. Tangled limbs and warm embraces with even slower kisses. The world can’t get to them under here, it’s safe and warm and away from onlookers and questions that cannot be answered. _I don't want to move_ , Dan says with his body under Phil’s. There’s things they need to do. Videos that need to be edited and suitcases that need to be packed and gifts that need to be wrapped. Dan goes back to their home soon, in London, where the sun may be shining a little bit more than Isle of Man but doesn’t have a Phil in it. 

That’s the only problem. 

_I don’t want to leave._ Dan presses his lips to Phil’s neck, nipping at the skin ever so slightly. There’s a small sigh and Phil pulls the covers back and they can breathe again. The cost of being safe under the blanket is losing the ability to breathe. It’s funny how that related to a lot of things in life. They stare at the ceiling, it doesn’t have posters that Phil had put up when he was a teenager, in fact the room is quite dull in comparison, there’s only a few things here that even represent Phil but this is not his home. Sometimes Dan had to remind himself that this was a temporary thing. 

“We have to take you to the airport.” Phil says, like Dan doesn’t already know that. 

“I know.” Dan reaches for Phil’s hand, holding it against his chest. 

“It’ll be fine.” Phil whispers. 

“I know.” 

It’s early enough in the morning for them to get up and make a cup of coffee and relax on the sofa a bit. So they put on acceptable pyjamas, the ones that Kathryn had bought for all of them, (and they had taken their pictures last night), and gone downstairs to put the coffee maker on. Phil had leaned against Dan for support, because he was tired, both not sleeping well in a bed that wasn’t theirs. Dan had woken up numerous of times last night though he knows it’s because his brain can’t keep quiet when it needs to. 

“It’s raining.” Phil says with a small smile, watching the trees by the window shake and the wind howl. 

Dan smiles because watching the rain was one of Phil’s favourite things to do. Dan had made them both a cup of coffee with just the right amount of milk and sugar and then they sat by the window, on the ground, which wasn’t as comfortable as the sofa but they were spending the last few hours together doing something they loved. 

“I’ve been thinking about that time you came to my house in Manchester. Mostly, when we went through the abandoned hospital and laid in the snow. I kept thinking that nothing could ever be as good as that moment, but we’ve had a lot of good moments since then.” Phil had intertwined their fingers again and Dan was grateful for it because his hands were so cold and his felt so warm. 

“We were young.” Young and in love and thinking that they were impossible then before the world showed them differently. They had accomplished a lot since then, learned to tackle the world in a different way; a quiet way, doing the things that they needed to do to survive, even if it hurt sometimes. But like with many things, you learn to adapt, and suddenly, without ever realizing, it’s all that you know, and it’s comfortable, safe. 

Dan and Phil were safe in a lot of ways because they made it that way, it didn’t happen without a few trial and errors along the way. 

“We’re still young,” Phil laughed softly, afraid to wake the house up. 

“We are. I just meant, the mentality- back then.” 

Phil knew what he meant. 

“I guess you’re right,” Phil had squeezed Dan’s hand. 

“I’m proud of you.” Phil had said again, pressing his lips against Dan’s shoulders, and he smelled the same if not a little like his parents house, which was pleasant but also different. “And us.” 

It’s like the early morning with warm, sweet, coffee made for an unfiltered conversation, but they were in a safe place with Christmas lights, heavy rain, and a hand to hold and a person to love. 

“Me too.” Dan presses a palm to Phil’s cheek and his thumb caress the bit of stubble that he loves. 

They lean against each other, not saying anything else because some of the best moments are left unsaid. 

Dan will leave for the airport soon and be back in a home that he shares with the person that he loves and it’ll feel familiar if not a little cold, but he can take it. The holidays will come and then they will go as they always do until that day when Dan and Phil come back, taking the decorations down and get ready for the New Year. A fresh start in many ways, and a new beginning for others. 

Right now, a warm cup of coffee and a rainstorm was pretty good. Dan leaned into Phil a little more. He couldn’t complain about much these days.

**Author's Note:**

> comments/kudos appreciated!
> 
> talk to me on tumblr/twitter: **@nihilismdan.**


End file.
